My Girls

How can something that is so simple (to me) be such a big deal to others…in a good way? That’s what I was thinking today as I went to the Lerato House for one of my last times. Today we had a goodbye party for the girls. Well, I guess you could say we just hung out. We brought dinner, cookies, and a movie (Hairspray…which they loved!!!). But, we also brought them gifts. This is where the simple part comes in.

I was actually really excited about our gifts but wasn’t sure what the girls would think. Laura and I took pictures with each girl and framed them. We had many other pictures from the year as well that we gave to each one. We also made cards and wrote nice notes to all the girls. When we gave them these gifts they were so excited! Their faces lit up! As they began opening them the screams started coming…more and more as each one opened their own. They were ecstatic! I couldn’t believe that something as simple as a picture could make someone that excited. But it did! I couldn’t stop smiling as I watched them run around the room showing each other the pictures they had gotten. I got some of the most genuine thank yous as well…accompanied by big hugs! It was a priceless moment!


We tried to take them outside to take one final group shot, and it took forever to organize them as they were still showing each other their “gifts”. But, we finally got them together and got one last amazing shot with “our girls”. So, here they are…our amazing, wonderful, unforgettable Lerato House girls…



(FRONT L-R: Thando, Maria, Nthabiseng BACK L-R: Me, Masika, Sibongile, Tebogo, Mmathapelo, Nonjabulo, Laura, Portia, House Mom Lizzie, Thabang, Dimakatso, Natalie, Bontle)

These girls have a huge part of my heart! I will forever remember this time in South Africa when I got to meet and spend time with 14 young girls and when these 14 young girls got to hang out with 2 random, crazy (white!) Americans.  This Thursday will probably be very tough as we say our very final goodbyes to them. Please pray for these girls. At times they ask, “Why are you leaving us?” It breaks my heart! I pray they know and remember the LOVE we have for them…and not that we “left” them. I pray they cherish these moments we had…as I will be doing! These girls all come from very tough backgrounds and have a long way to go. Although I won’t be with them in person any longer, they will always be remembered in my thoughts and prayers. They definitely showed me how to LOVE in a new way, and I am the better for it.

Thank you again for all your support and prayers throughout my time here! Because of you I was able to meet “my girls” and have an amazing time learning from them and knowing what it means to serve in love.

In Christ’s amazing Love,
manda

Visions

Hello all!

Last time I wrote, I told you that I would be sharing my vision statement with you. I am excited to be able to do that this week! Last Friday we had the chance to share our final drafts with our entire community and be prayed for. It was really great and very encouraging. Earlier that day, I had a great conversation with my roommate (brought on from book discussion and our Friday conversation) about following God and what it looks like. One of the main things we talked about was communion with God (one of the three “beats” of NieuCommunities…communion, community, and mission) and how that's where it all starts! How do we know we are going in the right direction? Are we trying to live out a vision that is only of us or one that has been given to us by God? Are we in touch with Him enough to even hear the vision He’s giving us? This year has taught me so much about communing with God. I have realized how important and crucial it is to me. I know that I don’t want to move in any direction if it’s not of Him. That’s not to say that I will have all the answers all the time. I know that there will be times when God is leading me, and I will only know enough to take the first step. But, I know it’s a good first step to take. I have also learned that it’s important to let yourself dream with God…to allow yourself to listen to what He may be saying. How often to we let ourselves dream or envision the future? I can say that I never used to dream. I never used to explore. I have never even been able to say where I see myself in the coming years. That has changed this year. I’m not saying that I know exactly what the rest of my life will look like, but I know who I am at the core and who God has made me to be…I know what drives me now…what gives me joy. Communing with God more and more got me there…that I know for sure! That said, I do know that I will be back in Atlanta missioning to the women and children that have been hurt by human trafficking and child prostitution. The specifics are still in the works but I am excited. I know that I am taking the right first steps and I am trusting God to show me the next ones. Following is my completed Vision Statement. I hope you enjoy it!

SELF. I desire to live a life fully devoted to God. I want to walk hand and hand with my Father and bring Him glory in all that I do. I want to dance with the Triune God. I want my fellowship with them to be so apparent that it is no longer me that people see but Christ. I hope to be the selfless, humble servant God has called me to be to all. I want to be a person of great love.

JUSTICE. I want to fight for justice, so that I no longer see hurt in the eyes of God’s children. I want to be an agent of change amongst a world that is seeking its own desires. I want to pour compassion, love, and kindness upon women and children that have been shut-out, stolen, broken, hurt, and emotionally destroyed. I want to show those that feel they have no worth that they are precious in their Father’s eyes. In doing all this I want to create a home where these women and children can come when they are in need…a place of rescue…a place of love.

COMMUNITY. I desire to live in intentional community and continue to learn what it means to be a Christian every day of the week. I want to live a life of simplicity with those around me so that our extra may be another’s gain. I want to live in such a way where it’s apparent that I don’t value the things of this world but the people. Because of this, I want my community to live among those in need so we can see clearly where God would use us. I desire a community of diversity—a life filled with all of those that will be sitting around God’s table one day.

LEAD. I want to teach, instruct, and lead in the way God has designed me. I desire others to learn about the injustices of this world and help them to fight it in their unique way. I want to journey with others as they learn what it means to be followers of Christ, and motivate them to use the gifts that God has given them.


Last week I also had the rare opportunity to visit my World Vision sponsor child, Maka. She lives in Lesotho (click for map) which is a country that is located within South Africa. It is actually pronounced “lesutu”…the h in African languages is silent. It worked out perfectly because the girls here went on trip to the Drakensberg mountains, which are on the border of Lesotho and South Africa. I had been trying to make this visit happen all year and the timing ending up being perfect. My friends (Kellie, Laura, Barbara) and I all made the trek in and were greeted warmly at the border by our World Vision host, Thuso. From there we drove to the World Vision office that is in charge of the area where my sponsor child lives. We were greeted warmly by all the staff and given the rundown of the recent projects, etc. After this, we got in the trucks and made our way up into the mountains where my child’s family lives. It was quite the bumpy ride but beautiful as well! Lesotho is quite picturesque, partly to do with the fact that it isn’t developed nearly as much as most countries. It has been an independent nation since 1964, but I don’t think there were many people other than natives living there in the first place. When we finally got up the mountain we had an amazing greeting by many, if not all, of the people in the village! As we got close to the house we had passed an elementary school. By the time we got to Maka’s house all the kids had run down! It was hilarious! We got some great pictures of it! Our time there mainly consisted of a welcome from the village chief and Maka’s family, members of the family dancing for us, and me having to address the crowd a few times! We had lunch, traditional food which was not too bad! Believe me…I am not always good at trying new food so it was a good time for me! I then gave my child and her family some gifts and they gave me many in return (also in the pictures). I really enjoyed my time in Lesotho with this family! I never dreamed I would have had this chance when I first started supporting her back in 2005. I was a little bummed that my child and her mom were so overwhelmed by the experience though. They were very shy!! I wanted to scoop Maka right up, but I knew that wasn’t going to happen.:) But, we did get some great pictures. Her face absolutely lit up when she got the coloring book and crayons! If you want more information on sponsoring a child through World Vision click here. Also, click here for pictures from my trip.

So, November 17th I will be back on American soil. Wow! I look forward to reconnecting and sharing in more detail what God has planned for my life.

Much Love,

manda

Life Compass and Slumber Party

(my awesome apprentice crew that i have had an amazing time with this year!
left to right...kellie, jody, andrew, laura, roger, me, mariah, and chris)

Eight weeks from today, Monday, I will be home! That’s really hard to take in sometimes. I’m not quite sure what to do with that yet. There is a lot to do here still, a lot to do to prepare to come home, and a lot to do once I get home. But, I have already promised myself that I will definitely take the time to enjoy family and friends over the holiday season and just get re-acclimated to American culture…try to at least. I know that will be a pretty difficult part of this whole process.

Throughout the past 3 weeks the apprentices here worked on our Life Compass’, which I mentioned briefly in my last update. The Life Compass is something CRM/NieuCommunities created to help people gain direction in their lives. We used all the personality tests that we took at the beginning of the year and a timeline of our lives (along with the actual Life Compass workbook) to bring all the pieces of this year together. We took an in depth look at our lives to see where God has taken us in the past, and what our gifts, talents, interests/longings, and values are. Sometimes I think we might know what those things are…but how often to you actually take the time to really think of those things? It’s a big part of who we are and most of us probably couldn’t truly answer the questions: What are your values? What do you like to do? What are your passions? What do you think you are good at? What has God gifted you with/in? (Take some time to think about those!) It was a hard but great process. All of this culminated in a Vision Statement for our lives. This was a bit difficult for me because I had never done that before. When I was out of work last year the questions above as well as “where do you see yourself in the future” kept coming up when I was job searching. It was really frustrating! Mainly because I didn’t feel like I knew how to get to the bottom of those questions. So, I was really glad to finally be able to answer some of those tough life questions to come up with a Vision Statement. You are now probably wondering, “What is your Vision Statement?” (or not!) Well, I still need a bit of time to work on it. We wrote our rough drafts and got feedback from the community, so I need to go back and revise now. I will be passing it along when I get it done as I am excited to share my future plans with you (as well as who I feel God has made me to be).

Speaking of future plans…I have definitely gotten the question, “What’s next for you?” many times! I am really glad to get it in one respect…people care for me and want to know what God is planning next. So, thanks for asking!! But, it’s also hard to answer that question. One reason is that my plans aren’t completely settled…which is ok. Another is that I am not quite ready to share what’s on my mind yet. That will come out more though when I share my final vision statement with you. For now, I am planning to be back in Atlanta. There are some ideas beyond that, but again, that will come later. Thanks again for your interest!

My ministry to the girls at the Lerato House has been great lately!!! I have been having so much fun with them! They just make me so happy, and I love being around them!!! I get so sad when I think about leaving them soon. I try not to think about it too much. They are just such amazing girls!! I feel so blessed and privileged to be apart of their lives! This past weekend, Laura and I had all the girls over to our house for a slumber party. It was so much fun!! The girls hardly ever do anything over the weekends so they were excited to get out of the house for a change. We picked them up on Saturday evening and had them at the house until about 1:30 on Sunday. (When I asked them what they did on Saturday they said, “we waited for you to come”. Priceless!!!) We made dinner for them on Saturday night and watched movies (Stomp the Yard and The Beauty Shop). Laura made cookies and popcorn for them as well…she is definitely gonna be the favorite mom on the block when she has kids!! Sunday we made breakfast and then the girls either played in the pool or watched another movie. They loved the pool!!! They never get to do that so even though the water was still pretty cold they had a blast! It was fun for Laura and me to watch them have so much fun this weekend! It will definitely be one of the highlights of this whole year.

(fun cooking breakfast)

Another part of this past Sunday was a baptism. The oldest girl in the house, Buyi, came to me a couple of weeks ago and told me she wanted to be baptized. I was so excited for her! She said she had decided that she wanted to start following God more seriously now and get back His path. She is such a great girl!!! She is a great leader in that house…a quiet leader. She is determined to do well and get her life back on track, both spiritually and in getting back to school to further her education. Buyi is 21 years old so she is already a bit behind. She wants to get to college so that she can move on and get a good job. Sometimes I am amazed at her attitude. There are times when she is really down, but mostly, she is positive and works really hard. I know it has to be extremely difficult to be living in a shelter at 21 and not even started on college. I am so proud of her though! Please pray for Buyi as she starts on a more determined path with God. I hope for such great things for her!

me (yes...one of the girls braided my hair), buyi, and laura

I guess that’s all for now. My blog posts and updates might be coming more rapidly…as busy as I am there will be a lot to tell in the coming months. So…be on the lookout! Thank you so much again for all that you have been for me this year! You all mean so much to me. I can’t explain how great it is to know how much I am supported and to be able to share this journey with you! Thank you!

LOVE LOVE

manda

Final Calendar

So, last week we got our final calendar for the year. The final calendar!!! I couldn’t believe it! For about 15 minutes we talked about “the rest of the year”. It was kinda hard to take all that in and think about the days when this would all be over. I can’t believe that time is coming up! We now have 11 full weeks left…that’s all! Time is really starting to wind down. However, we still have a very full schedule. Yet to come is a girls’ trip to the Drakensberg mountains (where the apprentices went in the beginning of the year…should be great!), hopefully a visit to my World Vision sponsor child…still working out the details to that, ministry as usual (time with the girls and time with Sister Melanie), an environmental weekend here at Pangani, Life Compass (where we look at where we have been and try to see where we might be going), and our final celebrations. It should be a great, full time…although I know it will be tough! I am really excited to get home and see my family and friends, but it’s going to be so hard to leave this place and these people! I am sure that will leave me with some crazy emotions in the coming weeks. But, God is good and I know He will be directing and guiding me through it all.

We are in the Imagining posture right now (and will go into the Entrusting posture to end the year). I am looking forward to revisiting all that I have done here and beginning to imagine what God could have in store for me down the road (this is where the Life Compass comes in). I am praying that I have an open mind, heart, and ears to all that God could be speaking to me during this time. I don’t want to be closed off to His ideas out of fear or by my own ideas getting in the way. It’s always an adventure with God…I want to be ready and willing!

Recent adventures:

Feast of the Clowns…a week long conference/celebration/festival that focuses on diversity in the city and taking back the city for the children. TLF (Tshwane Leadership Foundation…who runs Lerato House) puts this on annually and I believe this is the 8^th year. Throughout the week there are seminars, productions, classes, and a march to conclude the week. It’s a great time! Some of us went to see the Soweto Gospel Choir during the week and they were awesome!!! It was an amazing opportunity! We actually only got to see half of them so I am interested to see the whole group! The march at the end of the week was great as well! It was full of youth from all over the city singing and dancing through the street. I took some fun pictures of my girls from the Lerato House as well as all the other youth marching through the streets. See my pictures online here.

We also had our second (and last) week off during the week of August 17^th- 24^th. It was a great time to relax and enjoy this wonderful country by heading to Cape Town. This is an amazing city! The views are quite picturesque with the mountains and beaches in one place. We had perfect weather, which is rare for August. So, it was an extra amazing time. Click here for pictures from Cape Town. We got to see a number of great things while visiting…Table Mountain, the beautiful beaches (though not so much beach season yet), Hermanus (small coastal town with whale watching), Cape Point/Cape of Good Hope, South African Penguins, an Ostrich Farm, Wine Country (on our rainy last day), and a GREAT local market. I loved all of it!

The Road Trip of eight also finished up their time in the last month. They were here for a total of 2 weeks. It was cool to have visitors here who were checking out what we do and thinking about doing this same thing next year. I loved being able to share all that God has been doing in my life throughout this year and being able to encourage others. It was also fun to feel like a local in South Africa and even get to take others to Pilanesberg for a game drive. We saw tons of animals and even came very close to being stampeded by a huge elephant! That was both super scary and super cool all at the same time. Sadly, the time with the Road Trip ended on the same day that Passion took place. So, I ended up having to make a choice and I opted out of going to Passion. I would have really liked to have seen Passion international, but I was really exhausted from the Road Trip and wanted to see them off and hear their closing sentiments from the past 2 weeks. Next time.

Ministry with the girls continues to go well. Some of the girls are becoming more and more comfortable with us and I enjoy them all more and more. However, I have to say that it is difficult only seeing them twice a week. Sometimes it feels a bit disjointed and I often feel like I should be doing more. It makes me wonder how things could be if this were my full time job. It makes me wonder about the future and if this kind of thing will be apart of my life when I return to Atlanta. We’ll see! I am also enjoying meeting up with Sister Melanie once a week on Tuesdays. It has been inspiring to me to see her dedication and passion in fighting Human Trafficking. She is a great woman and I feel blessed to know her! I feel she will be someone I will be in contact with for a long time. I have mainly been doing office work with her still, which is fine by me. It has been good to help her out in this way and do some things for her that would normally take her much longer to do. I guess living in the bush for 23 years doesn’t help your computer skills much.

Oh yeah…speaking of Sister Melanie…the march for human trafficking! So, Mariah and I tried to be apart of the March at the beginning of the month. We got a flyer that said the event (speakers back at City Hall also) was going to be from 10-1. Well, we got there at about 9:45 and went on a wild goose chase trying to find the march. Apparently there were a few things going on for Women’s Day so people were a bit confused when we asked them about the march. We finally just went back to City Hall to find that the program was almost over. We had completely missed the march…which ended up starting at about 9! Typical Africa for you! But, Mariah and I had a great time! We had our own signs and marched through the streets on our own. We met some fun people along the way and enjoyed every second of it. So, my first march ever…a semi-success!

I guess that’s about all I have been up to recently. As busy as it’s been I have managed to have some great times with God and am still trying to read through the Old Testament. I am currently on Esther and hope to be through Job by the middle of next week. My friend who I am reading with is on Isaiah so I am going to just skip Psalms and Proverbs to try and catch up with him. It has really been a highlight for me. I love reading through big chunks of the Bible at a time and highly recommend it. It brings a whole new light to it.

Prayer Request: Please pray for my health. I got sick the first couple days of Cape Town and was in bed all day one day (actually many of our community members caught the flu that week). But, I have not been able to get fully better since then. I have had a nagging cough and now I am starting to go downhill again with a sore throat, congestion, and headache. It’s kind of a bummer. So, please pray that I would recover from this illness. Actually, while you are at it, pray for Jody as well. He has been sick longer than I have and can’t seem to shake it either. Thanks so much!!!!

I hope you are all well! Send any prayer requests my way as well!

Much Love to all!

manda

Recent Happenings...

Each Friday at Pangani we have our Worship/Prayer night…I guess you could call it our community church service. Each week people take the responsibility of cooking the meal, watching/teaching the kids, or planning the night for the adults. Sometimes we have guests joining us (people from our local community or those we are involved with in ministry) or it’s just us. It does take some work to pull it off each week and we are usually very tired by Friday, but it’s always worth it. A couple of weeks ago I was in charge of planning the night. We had been focusing a lot on justice in the last weeks so I decided to focus on human trafficking. We watched the Not for Sale documentary, prayed, made orange wristbands to wear all week to remember to pray, and checked out the website Trade As One (which sells products made by former slaves). It was a great night (as good as focusing on something like that can be) and people were glad to be made more fully aware of this issue plaguing our world.

We also attended a conference recently put on by the Institute for Urban Ministries. The focus was on bringing HOPE back to the cities. We heard stories of people from all over Africa and a couple from the US who are working to bring hope into their cities. I was surprised at how international the conference was: people from Burundi, Kenya, the DRC, Mozambique, Holland, the US, Canada, Germany, and all over the South Africa. It was great! It really encouraged and inspired me to hear the stories of hope and that there are people all over the world fighting the same fight.

Good news…I did end up meeting with another lady who works against human trafficking here!! She is actually a sister (Sister Melanie) who used to work here for 23 years teaching in the Kwa-Zulu Natal province. (She is originally from Ireland). She is amazing! She has been working to fight trafficking for the past 6 months and is doing a great job so far! I am mainly helping her with office work that she is behind on and might help her with some speaking engagements in the near future! Her main goal is prevention versus finding a cure…though that is an important and needed thing here as well. The fight against human trafficking itself has a ways to go in SA, but I am glad to see people fighting. The other cool part is that I have been able to get Sister Melanie and Wilna (the first lady I met with) together for a meeting…which will likely take place August 5^th. I am excited that I was able to play the role of getting them together and that God would use me in that way. Also, on August 8^th there is a Women’s Day walk/march downtown to stand up for women’s rights and to stand against human trafficking and legalizing prostitution. Sister Melanie will be giving a speech at the end of the march, which will be really great! I am looking forward to being in my first march and standing up for what I am working for!

The next couple of weeks will be a bit crazy here. We have a group of 8 visitors here on a Road Trip, which is a 2 week journey people take to get to know NieuCommunities and to see if doing the 10 month apprenticeship is for them. They are mostly from the United States but we do have one girl who lives in Pretoria (though she is originally from Zimbabwe) joining us. We have been working hard to get things ready and we are excited to have the road trippers with us. At the end of the 2 weeks I will be volunteering at the Passion conference. I am excited about this because I have volunteered at the last two 4-day events they had (2006 in Nashville and 2007 in Atlanta) and have had great experiences. In 2008 Louie Giglio (the founder of Passion, an organization aimed at igniting the college generation for Christ) decided to take Passion international! When I originally heard that I thought it would be great to be able to volunteer at one but thought it very unlikely. So, I was excited to see that one would be taking place in Johannesburg when I was going to be here! On August 9^th, 3 other friends and I will be headed to Jo’burg to experience Passion International!

Finally, last week during our weekly check-in time, our group participated in a lectio divina. This is something we do quite frequently but it always brings up something new each time. The idea behind a lectio is to read a passage of scripture slowly and meditatively in order to really think on it. Someone reads it through about 3 times and you focus on a word or phrase that sticks out to you. It’s a great way of reading scripture, both individually and corporately. It’s nice to “take it slow” and just take in the words being spoken. Last week I had a cool experience with it. God rarely, if ever, speaks to me with images and this time He did! As our friend here was reading the last 2 verses of Psalm 139 Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any offensive way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting, the following came into my mind. (“in the way everlasting” stuck out the most.) I got an image of two paths. One was dark and windy and had trees with thorns all over it stretching out across the path. Whichever way you tried to walk you would be stabbed with a thorn. There was no way to escape it. Although it looked horrible, it was still in someway tempting, as the dark path can be sometimes. The other path was sunny and had green pastures on either side stretching for miles. However, there were hills and valleys throughout that would be tough to get through. The road was good, but difficult, and yet there was still that temptation to go the other route. As I took in the image I felt myself standing at the crossroads between those two paths…always having to make the decision of which one to take. The image reminded me that although the road with God can be tough at times, it’s still the better path. The path of darkness may at times seem good and be what you think you want…but it’s not everlasting. There will always be things “getting in the way” to your happiness. There will never be true fulfillment. The way everlasting is God’s way. He will always be the only one who can bring you that true fulfillment you are looking for.I continue to learn that lesson over and over through many failures but it’s a great one to keep learning. “Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long.” (Psalm 25:4-5)

I hope you are all well! I continue to think and pray for you all. I have come to truly love having a support team back home. (financially, prayerfully, and emotionally). It gives me such peace to know that I have people praying for me and caring about me and my whereabouts. It’s an amazing gift from God and I wouldn’t want to be doing this on my own. So, thank you again for being my support!

Much Love,

manda

Fellowship

Wow! It’s been a really long time since I’ve updated. Sorry! That probably means this will be a long post. I will try my best to be as concise as possible. I will start with the overall updates first.

Things have been going really well at the Lerato House (the shelter for girls). There have been three new girls added within the past 2 weeks so they number is up to 14. Laura and I go every Monday and Thursday now. Monday is devoted to devotionals/Bible study as well as hanging out, and Thursdays are just for hanging out. It’s been great getting to know the girls more and more and to see them become more comfortable with us. We have been trying to get some one-on-one time with different girls because we feel like that is when growth will happen. It’s hard to really connect with them when everyone is around…especially since they end up speaking in their languages about 90% of the time. We have also gotten to know more about their histories and why some of them have come to live there. Some of it is really tough stuff! I don’t know how some of them keep going! It’s amazing to me and a huge testament of their strength…and God’s strength working through them. I know He is with them and has brought each of them to the Lerato House for a reason. I truly feel so blessed and privileged to get to spend time with them each week. Prayer request: that the barriers of language, culture, differences in backgrounds (specifically their difficult backgrounds) wouldn’t actually be barriers.

Monday, June 16 the apprentices were in charge of hosting a Braai (bbq) in a nearby park. This was a nation-wide holiday (Youth Day) so most people had off from work and the kids were off from school. The event was to go along with our Inviting Posture. All of us, including staff, invited guests to come hang out with us, play soccer, and enjoy yummy food! It was a huge success and we had lots of fun…I think about 70 people were there! Laura and I went to pick up our girls to come hang out. I think they really enjoyed getting away from the house for the day…as they usually just laze around the house when they have days off. Below was going to be a picture from the day of me, Laura and the girls…but the internet was acting up. Sorry! (See the other link that I sent out.)

I am starting to feel like the door to get involved in the activist side of the anti-trafficking movement may be closing. I have yet to meet again with the lady at the Tshwane Leadership Foundation. I also had a meeting set up with someone else this past Tuesday and it fell through. We have set another meeting for next Tuesday so we’ll see. If it doesn’t pan out from there then I am going to stop pursuing it at this time. I don’t think it’s a closed door forever…just for this time. There are so many things we are responsible for here each day, and I don’t want to spread myself too thin. Volunteering at the Lerato House, spending time with my community, working through any assignments I have from “class”, and spending time with God keeps me pretty busy.

This past weekend we hosted a Taste and See for our NieuCommunities site. There are many people we are connected with here, and they are always asking, “So, what do you do?” There are also those that are asking, “How can we do ‘church’ differently?” It was a really great weekend. We gave people a small glimpse into what we do here, and we had some great conversations about how we can be the church in South Africa and what that should look like. There is a lot of work yet to be done, but I think things are moving in the right direction. There are a lot of people here excited about getting back to the basics of Christianity and who are excited about seeing a change.

I guess what’s left is the personal part to the update. It’s been an interesting time for me the past month or so. I went through a time of doubting and questioning lately…of my faith, my place here, my purpose. It was really tough. I am here to serve God, be with God, learn more about God (while living in community and serving others), but I didn’t feel like doing any of that. I wasn’t sure where it came from either. I was left to search and question and try to get back to where I had been before…in love with God and running full force after Him. I wasn’t sure how to get there though. I just kind of sat in the feelings for a while. I truly didn’t know which direction to walk and I wasn’t sure I wanted to move. It was interesting though because in all my doubting and questioning I would still go to God. I knew He was there…I knew He always would be. I could never even begin to deny Him. I just really wanted to feel His presence…I wanted to feel excited about my faith again.

When the doubts first started happening, I somehow knew it was just going to be for a time. I knew when I got to the other side of it that I would be chasing after God in a new way again, and I looked forward to that! I had been in valleys before, but they still stink. They are still never where you want to be…even if you know you will learn great things from them in the end. Two weekends ago we went on a retreat. It was a great time for me. I was finally ready (and knew it would probably happen that weekend) to get back on track with God; to start seeking Him again.

On the retreat, I read a book about the Trinity called “The Great Dance”. It was actually life changing for me. It opened my eyes to how the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit interact and how we have been invited into that their circle…into their dance. The Trinity is all about fellowship, and by Jesus coming to Earth and becoming fully human, we were allowed to be apart of that. It’s really beautiful. I realized more and more (as I have been realizing here the past 5 months) that being a Christian is all about fellowship. Jesus came and spent time with people…ate with them…cried with them…laughed with them…stayed with them. It’s such a small gesture sometimes, but it can be the most important one as well. God wants me (my fellowship) and he also wants me to fellowship with those around me…family, friends, insiders, outsiders, widows, poor, orphans, everyone! God is a God of relationships. I had realized throughout my time of questioning that I was in mind game with God. I was trying to reason Him out in my head, try to figure Him out, and have all my questions answered. I knew I was headed down the wrong path with that, but I didn’t know how to stop it. I am so glad to be back on the path of fellowship with God…which is right where He wants me. Cheesy…I know…but I am glad to be apart of The Great Dance.

I have been reading a ton in the Old Testament which has been helping a great deal as well. It has been good to get back to God…back to how it all began. At times the Old Testament can seem daunting and overwhelming to read. A friend of mine here and I are really challenging each other to be intentional with our Old Testament reading. It has been great! I encourage you to dive into it! There is some good stuff in there…and some comical stuff as well.

Well…there it is! The super long update. I hope it wasn’t too confusing! It has been hard to get all these thoughts down and try to make them clear. I have actually been working on this post for a few days. I will leave you with a quote by a well-liked author around our house…Pete Rollins. It says in a nutshell why I love this community I live in!

“In contrast to the view that evangelism is that which gives an answer for those who are asking, we must have faith to believe that those who seek will find for themselves. If this is true, then the job of the Church is not to provide an answer…but rather to help encourage the religious questions to arise…One of the roles of the Church is provide a sacred place for this exploration.” (Peter Rollins, “How (Not) to Speak of God, pg. 40-41)

Much LOVE!

manda

The Girls and Faith

This is a post I know not where to begin. Things have been fairly slow lately…we had a week off from “studies” and just chilled around the house/town most of the time. It’s been a nice week of relaxing, but I am ready to get back on schedule. This coming week most of our scheduled time will be taken up with a conference of Sacred Romance. A local couple, who are very good friends of NieuCommunities, will be doing the conference. I am looking forward to it! I have never gotten to read the books by John Eldredge (besides Captivating which he co-authored with this wife), but I have heard good things about them and this conference! If you want to know more you can go to this link.

Last week, May 13^th-15^th, I had the opportunity to stay with the girls I will be working with throughout the rest of my time here. They live in a fairly nice home. It has 2 bigger bedrooms where the girls sleep (3 sets of bunk beds in each) and a smaller bedroom where the house mother sleeps (there are 3 moms that rotate throughout the weeks). They also have a homework room, a small living room, a kitchen, and one bathroom. Yes…one bathroom for 10 girls and a house mom! But, they seem to manage fine and that bathroom is probably a lot nicer than the ones they are accustomed to. All in all, a great place for the girls to live.

The time with the girls was great! We hung out with the staff during the day while they were at school (and even got to do one day of prison outreach). Then, we hung with the girls from about 3:00 on doing homework or just getting to know them more. We watched movies with them at night…which they really loved! I think it was a great treat for them. They cooked us dinner, which was so nice! Sometimes it’s hard to accept the great treatment we are given. They always want to give us the biggest portions, the best food, and the nicest things. One girl even gave up her bed for me! It makes me wonder why they do it. Is it just because we are a guest? Is it just in their nature/culture to be so hospitable? I am not totally sure the reasons, but it’s always really sweet to see…and makes me think of how I treat my guests!

As I stayed there with the girls I felt such joy! As we sat around watching movies I could see the little girls inside of them…the little girls that have been stolen away by poverty, abuse, neglect. I could see how much they enjoyed just being girls, with no worries, no hurt, no pain…just girls. So many hard times and struggles have already come their way, yet, I could see the light in them that Jesus sees. I could feel the joy in knowing that they are His. They are precious in His sight. I pray that they are or become precious in the sight of those around them…including themselves. Please pray for the 10 girls at the Lerato House…as well as the house moms. They are all in need…in one way or another! Thank you so much!

I did not get to meet with Wilna last Tuesday from the Tshwane Leadership Foundation…who works on trafficking. She got tied up with something else and had to cancel our meeting. I will admit that I was super frustrated by her cancellation. She is an extremely busy woman, but there are times here when people just cancel things and think nothing of it…or are really late to meetings. Everyone jokes about things being on Africa time, but it’s true! As a Westerner it can be one of the hardest things to get used to! It’s hard not to take things personally and to not feel unappreciated. But, I am still praying that the meeting comes about in the very near future. When I spoke with her on the phone she seemed excited to meet and get things going further with trafficking in South Africa…she didn’t seem to think there was near enough being done. So, please pray that the meeting would take place soon and that I would be patient in the mean time! God’s timing…right? :)

Personally, I have been in a rote place spiritually. I think in part it has been the week off. I tend to get in a bit of slump when I don’t have a steady schedule of sorts. I can get extremely unmotivated. But, lately, I seem to have been questioning the nearness of God. I don’t always know what to make of that. Sometimes I just wonder how He can know me…how He can care about me…how He can know what’s going on in my life…how He can be close to me while He feels so far. I know it’s not always about Him feeling close…about me hearing from Him…about always being on a spiritual high. Hebrews 11:1 tells us, “Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see.” I love that verse but had a hard time grasping it for the longest time. I actually read a sermon by John Piper once which helped clarify things for me…click here to read it. I just reread it myself and this in particular stood out this time… “In other words, faith grasps - lays hold of - God's preciousness so firmly that in the faith itself there is the substance of the goodness and the sweetness promised. Faith doesn't create what we hope for - that would be a mere mind game. Faith is a spiritual apprehending or perceiving or tasting or sensing of the beauty and sweetness and preciousness and goodness of what God promises - especially his own fellowship, and the enjoyment of his own presence.” I know that God is with me…ALWAYS! I trust in that and take hold of it. Sometimes it’s just difficult when I don’t feel him close and have to rely purely on Faith. I choose to Believe.

Thank you to all for your continued prayers! I think about my family and friends often and continue to feel the blessing of having you journey with me.

Much Love,

manda